2009 Looking for a stability point as information from the past

I just realized that I’m still looking for a stability point within myself without realizing that I cant find a point of stability other then being here in the breath. I’m so used of looking for a stability point in my databank of memories that I almost can ‘see’ how I access information within myself scanning all memories for something to hold onto which isn’t there I cant find it because it doesn’t exist.

Looking for an experience of myself to hold onto, to cling onto.

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