When being with Zina and Loulou I realize more and more that trust is being established not from the perspective of being the authority figure to them for them as them and as the pillar within the system but as common sense, the thing we have in common, When I walk in common sense they will see that I will always act in the best interest of all. In this we cant fuck with each other and trust real trust can be established between us because we do not have any personal hidden interest to live for.
When directing them is in the best interest of all we do not have secrets or personal desires or any personal definitions so in this we stand as one&equal and we wont fuck with each other.
They understand this and see this
Today Zina said to me Mommy you won’t be angry with Lou because she was wearing plasters and then I said did granny told you that? Yes she said
But ok hey here I have to be careful now
So I said to her, ok whatever people say always see for yourself Ok?
See if I’m angry? Ok she replied satisfied with the answer.
Granny has her ways of dealing with all kind of things knowing that I do not agree when she’s wearing plasters for fun, or when she didn’t really hurt herself
Granny will say
Your mom will get angry at you when you wear them without bleeding
Not directing it in common sense, so Zina is asking me why I didnt get angry while granny has told her so
When being with ZIna now that she’s getting older, I see that the more aware I get, become the more I’m able to communicate with her and be with her
To see her
To hear her