2011 Back Chat within Creates without

I started a back-chat diary

w o w

That’s in fact revealing and dirty to say the least, all that severely hurts me within others behavior which always led to self compromise because I couldn’t  ‘stand’ within it exist within me as well.

So I bring it all back to self Here after I got possessed by anger towards a person. Took me a day to get this starting point straight again, sometimes I still try to convince if maybe, possibly, someone else is to blame for my experience – lol  – can’t do. This anger outburst of mine I can see  clearly now created through firstly fear towards seeing this person agin and while seeing this person again while talking together it became anger fed by allowed back chat which I can see is part of a suppressed unresolved part of me, not yet faced shit. I see clearly that I wasn’t directing me immediately in the moment when the fear was here within me  and I actually allowed to become petrified and that led to anger. My mis take.

The back chat that’s the most revealing is the one that is instantaneously simultaneously manifested while observing/participating within my world/reality . I can clearly see that it always accompanies a feeling, holds information.

Those, the immediate back-chats are the ones that are holding hidden self definitions, those I want to hold on to. The automation of the back-chat is indicative of these personality traits through simply observing/hearing the back chats while participating within my world/reality.

Kind of ugly shit – especially knowing that all exist within such ugly shit! If the back-chat would be revealed in one moment when talking to each other we would through the nastiness of it go insane or be in severe trouble by the ugliness of it.Probably we would smack each others heads. Back-chat the outflow of the principle of destruction to keep one firmly seated within ones Ego. This destruction is what we are living into being, the manifested consequence which is this world/ this reality.

Ok, so I got slightly depressed and severely shocked by the existence of the ugliness within me, the pile of ugliness is endless there seems to be always more, which is nothing else than waking up to the extend of the fuckedness of ones existence, alright, so I can’t stay within such allowed state for too long.

I’ve been creating the ugliness myself, Ok, so I push myself so I can stop myself and learn from the soft voices in my head; which is rather loud in its demands for winning and its call for destruction.Everyone’s backchat is as ugly as mine its real nasty shit. I will investigate my back chat, time to get the nasty shit out.

Back chat diaries the real secret within

2011 Mothers Children and Health Care

DID YOU KNOW?

In our world today nearly 11 million children under the age of 5 die in the world every year – well over 1,200 every hour most from easily preventable or treatable causes.

Fucked up and totally unnecessary.

When one of my kids is in pain, injured or ill, I’ll try to make them better, see a doctor, get a perspective so that the kids are able to get the required treatment and its done. I would get extensively stressed when I’m not able to solve it.

All mothers want to do exactly what I am doing, getting help for their children. Millions of mothers are not within that position. Just a simple act of care which is denied to millions of mothers and thus to their children. Medical care is a Basic Human Right, every one should have access to Free Health Care. It shouldn’t be something you have to earn or to fight for, no, it must be Given simply because we’re in this world.

Equal money will root out such allowed atrocities- in the name off free market and capitalism -to exist

2011 Automated Existence

I had to call the infant welfare centre for the exact details about the vaccination Zina got when she was a bit younger, I needed to double-check it to exclude a certain illness before I consulted a doctor.

I dialed the number and now I entered the telephone operation, which is completely automated you can only choose out of the given possibilities, press 1 or press 2 and so on.

I wasn’t really paying attention I missed my “press moment” so the whole sequence started again from the beginning.

Finally I got the procedure ‘right’ meaning I now successfully followed the pattern of the program yet this took me probably more than 15 min. before I actually got to speak with a person. Sigh.

Now another procedure started yet with a human being, and again I wasn’t really paying attention, not here in the moment breathing I allowed myself to drift off in an habitual response, the automated me.

I used to really despise this automated telephone operation systems to exist within the first place. I always struggled/fought with this kind of automated systems. This I expressed in being extremely uncooperative when it came down to these kind of phone calls as little small acts of ‘rebellion’ towards the system yet it isn’t rebellion in fact. It actually expresses complete lack of understanding of the system and how its operates. I Constricted myself within an idea of a small act of ‘rebellion’ against it when in fact I was operating within the system  perfectly! I wasn’t even aware that I was ‘rebelling’ against my own image and likeness.

This brings me to the following question: Where do you ‘rebel’ against?

2011 Wanting to be more than what is Real

So I can see how I have been trying the last couple of weeks to subtle manoeuvre myself to be more than the physical reality and it started to compound anger as well – so careful here because I can see how this is creating much friction and this will then be the layout of me towards the world and everything that enters my world – not cool!

Ok so the girls have been sick for the last couple of weeks. I actually never visited in such short time either a doctor or a dentist as the last couple of weeks. So being with them 24/7 is a story in itself when they’re sick it becomes quite a story-lol

I must then stop all the things I’m participating within, and reschedule everything at once. And here it started to become a bit ‘vague’ because I was juggling between: “I can do the things I must do versus  still be there for them.”

Nope! Time has proven this over and over again: – Can’t do, won’t work!

So today I said and applied: Ok! They’re sick and that’s what is here and that’s what I’m able and must direct. Its simply needs to be done! Trying to be more than what the physical reality in the moment requires is really stupidity in action. So therefore I stop and I let it go.

Ok that’s it for today

2011 Back Chat as Mind POSSEssion

So some side-notes about my commitment to post my writings onto my blog

Before I pushed the enter button thoughts are flashing through my mind – the girls refer to thoughts as movies within our heads- we have become possessed by the movie in our heads.

Thoughts as back-chat:

– “Its pointless”

– “I’m being dramatically within my writings”

– “I’m pedant within my writings”

So actually activities/characteristic I categorized as ‘bad’ and that’s why I don’t want to be seen as such. It holds judgment and fear

– “Its pointless”

Inherent belief that one can’t ‘fight’ the Giant, all Ants together makes the Giant.

– “I’m being dramatically within my writings”

Ok so here I see judgment towards emotions, and judgments as fear towards energy.

– “I’m pedant within my writings”

subtle self manipulation where I’m then tempted to give into b/c its seemingly ok to not want to act in a certain way, there doesn’t exist such a ‘certain’ way in fact, its only one way the way thats best for all.

Explaining yourself why you shouldn’t do something through reasoning is always irrational and uses logic to make your point valid and is actually a mind possession, so you walk your day from one mind possession to the next one. Really unnecessary.

We reason our way into infinity, we have become the Posse of the Possessed ones with no other reason than to keep the cause of the reason=possession alive. Time to get back to reality!

Get to know your mind demons:

http://demonology.co.za

2011 How I assist myself when standing before a window of opportunity. Time looping or Correction – Process Support Writings

In my previous blog entry I have been writing about some layers as resistance, those are returning experiences of myself. It can actually be all kind of experiences such as fear of people, fear of speaking up etc.Points  which I simply can push myself through because I already prepared the way before me through writing opening up the construct the layout, who I am within it. So here I will share some pointers on how I practically walk such alignments.

Time looping:

Either one goes into an unnecessary experience through self compromise, giving into a ‘weakness’/personality trait /pattern that one is actually more than ready to take on and walk into correction, yet one still holds on to the old. Not yet pushing Self absolute into being, still doubts and mind/back – chat going on. Then one will go into a time loop, walk into an experience and then write ones SF again yet now not about the actual point but about not pushing oneself through the resistance. The longer one post-phone the actualization of ones re-alignment the more difficult it becomes. One will get to a point where one just don’t trust oneself anymore, same as with falling while quitting an addiction one have failed oneself just to many times. And from here each attempt to stop thus change oneself becomes more difficult. I have found within me that it can take a very long time before one readied oneself again to take the point on again.

Self-Correction:

Or one just walks through it in every given moment when the resistance as tiredness; sleepiness, procrastination, fear etc. presents itself. Stop, breath push and what assist me practically within such moments is to ask myself whether it’s worth it to make an experience out of the perceived wall of resistance. I am the one who decides whether I hold onto what I prefer or walk into and as Principle. So in essence showing myself that I am the one that choose to experience myself as tiredness; sleepiness; fear and so on and no one else. I decide how I experience myself, it’s either Yes or No, simple!

When or while walking through the resistance and more points are opening up that I didn’t yet realized or seen within me I flag-point it and go back to the drawing board again.

Prepare the way before yourself so you will be equipped the next time you face the same point again. Every window holds the key to change and so I expand on walking into understanding, realigning myself; which is a fascinating journey, as we all know by now!

2011 Bringing about the MessAge- Self Corrective Writings

Posting my writings onto my blog is what I’m currently push into being.

A resistance a layer that I can clearly see is to postpone bringing a task or activity to an end, to finish what one has started.

Finish
Latin ‘Finis’ ‘end’
Ok finish a task or activity, making my writings tangible, to derive it from the ‘skeleton’ my daily writings into a compact comprehensive message in sight of the eye of the public, to publish the message so we can end the mess of this age through the living word. So to walk it is a self willed consistent daily commitment.

Another layer of resistance is to publish my writings because then it becomes public.

Publish
The Latin word is ‘Publicare’ – make public.‘I’ very much resist to be in sight of all eyes, some love it, ‘I’ as pattern don’t. That’s why I will ‘I’ to bring about the Message in sight for all eyes so we can for once and for All End the Mess of this Age.

2011 Zina 5 years:“Some children don’t have food to eat they will become very thin and that is not a nice thing because then they die.”

And that is that, simple facts explained in a simple way.

We don’t want to tell our children and their children’s children the same story over and over again. This is how it is, poverty exists. It always has been like this and it will always be like this. No! Destonians say:  S t o p !

EquALL Food for everyOne – Radical Equality – Prepare the way before the children and those yet to come.

Equal money for all http://equalmoney.org/

The world hunger problem: Facts, figures and statistics

• In the Asian, African and Latin American countries, well over 500 million people are living in what the World Bank has called “absolute poverty”
• Every year 15 million children die of hunger
• For the price of one missile, a school full of hungry children could eat lunch every day for 5 years
• Throughout the 1990’s more than 100 million children will die from illness and starvation. Those 100 million deaths could be prevented for the price of ten Stealth bombers, or what the world spends on its military in two days!
• The World Health Organization estimates that one-third of the world is well-fed, one-third is under-fed one-third is starving- Since you’ve entered this site at least 200 people have died of starvation. Over 4 million will die this year.
• One in twelve people worldwide is malnourished, including 160 million children under the age of 5. United Nations Food and Agriculture
• The Indian subcontinent has nearly half the world’s hungry people. Africa and the rest of Asia together have approximately 40%, and the remaining hungry people are found in Latin America and other parts of the world. Hunger in Global Economy
• Nearly one in four people, 1.3 billion – a majority of humanity – live on less than $1 per day, while the world’s 358 billionaires have assets exceeding the combined annual incomes of countries with 45 percent of the world’s people. UNICEF
• 3 billion people in the world today struggle to survive on US$2/day.
• In 1994 the Urban Institute in Washington DC estimated that one out of 6 elderly people in the U.S. has an inadequate diet.
• In the U.S. hunger and race are related. In 1991 46% of African-American children were chronically hungry, and 40% of Latino children were chronically hungry compared to 16% of white children.
• The infant mortality rate is closely linked to inadequate nutrition among pregnant women. The U.S. ranks 23rd among industrial nations in infant mortality. African-American infants die at nearly twice the rate of white infants.
• One out of every eight children under the age of twelve in the U.S. goes to bed hungry every night.
• Half of all children under five years of age in South Asia and one third of those in sub-Saharan Africa are malnourished.
• In 1997 alone, the lives of at least 300,000 young children were saved by vitamin A supplementation programmes in developing countries.
• Malnutrition is implicated in more than half of all child deaths worldwide – a proportion unmatched by any infectious disease since the Black Death
• About 183 million children weigh less than they should for their age
• To satisfy the world’s sanitation and food requirements would cost only US$13 billion- what the people of the United States and the European Union spend on perfume each year.
• The assets of the world’s three richest men are more than the combined GNP of all the least developed countries on the planet.
• Every 3.6 seconds someone dies of hunger
• It is estimated that some 800 million people in the world suffer from hunger and malnutrition, about 100 times as many as those who actually die from it each year.

2011 Meditation silence your Ability to change for Real

When I was ‘into’ yoga and meditation I always heard the phrase: “Let go!” I got to a point where I concluded that I didn’t understood what I had to let go off and furthermore how to let go. Sitting in the meditation classroom I was looking around; everyone sitting still -including me -being in a deep hypnotic state because really what else can it be then a conditioned state of being where you silence the mind for a moment, – balance yourself in a place in the middle – before you go ‘back’ to the old ways and become the same person as you were before. That’s how I experienced myself after meditation, never being able to hold onto this perceived silence of mind.

I was kind of leaning towards a point of addiction to sit ‘still’, trying to get into a state of trance/hypnosis or perceived silence. To have a sense of ‘I’ am doing ‘Good’; ‘I’ am Caring ‘I’am ‘Love’; ‘I’am Light; ‘I’am ‘Bliss’; ‘I’am ‘United’ ‘I’am ‘Silence’; ‘I’am ‘Infinite’; ‘I’am ‘Spirit’ and more of such ‘enlightened’ symbols that meditation carries. I actually never knew WTF I was busy with yet it gave me a sense of ‘doing something good in unity’ and a sense of  ‘serenity’.

“Yoga stills the fluctuation of the mind” Pantanjali Yoga sutra’s 1.2

The rise and fall of flow of thoughts, feelings and emotions and the quest of silencing this ‘flow’ can’t be walked if one doesn’t yet understand, nor investigate the ‘fluctuation’ as thoughts, feelings and emotions in its totality. The raw truth of our physical actions as the rise and fall of flow as thoughts, feelings and emotion is what we have become and live. The inherent urge to silence the mind this automated stream of thoughts, feelings and emotions shows us that we aren’t the ones in Control. It shows us by wanting ‘silence’ and ‘peace of mind’ that we perceive something disturbing and wrong within the constant stream of the mind as experience. Meditation then becomes trying to silence the mind thus to control the constant stream without knowing what you are dealing with.

 

Yoga is mediation in action

Within the above perspective given on “Yoga stills the fluctuation of the mind” you can revisit the phrase: “Yoga is mediation in action” and see for yourself when forcing yourself into silence as a perceived physical action will eventually lead to friction and frustration and the suppressed parts of self will eventually express itself. It’s saying to a child: -“Sit still or Stop playing.” Impossible! It’s inherent within its nature to express it self. That’s a law within this reality! One should ask oneself what do we want to silence and why and how did we end up by wanting to silence this automated stream of thoughts,our inherent Human Nature is that we are controlled by the automated fluctuations of the mind.

 

My next step was looking at the term Ahimsa:

Ahimsa (Sanskrit: Devanagari; अहिंसा; IAST ahiṃsā, Pāli: avihiṃsā) is a term meaning to do no harm (literally: the avoidance of violence – himsa). It is an important tenet of the Indian religions (Hinduism, Buddhism and especially Jainism). Ahimsa means kindness and non-violence towards all living things including animals; it respects living beings as a unity, the belief that all living things are connected. Indian leader Mohandas Karamchand Gandhi strongly believed in this principle.[1] Avoidance of verbal and physical violence is also a part of this principle, although ahimsa recognizes self-defense when necessary, as a sign of a strong spirit. It is closely connected with the notion that all kinds of violence entail negative karmic consequences.

This terminology was ‘speaking’ to me because really: Who doesn’t want to be seen as the one that is doing no harm and is kind and non violence towards all living things?  Seems cool and promising to become and be such a person. I mean yeah it’s seen as good characteristics and highly valuated by all.

It seems so kind and loving and caring yet when having another look at what it actually practically physically entails. You will see how the above words only encompasses a state of being that contains thoughts/feelings and nothing of real substance that will give you any practical tools so you can utilize it to establish: Doing no Harm. Claiming such state of being: “Doing no Harm” with no practical tools given other then: -“Be love”; “Be light”; “Be Bliss”, “Be good”, “Be unity”; Be kindness; “Be non violent”. The total absence of any substantial practical tool that can be utilized by All to manifest Doing No Harm doesn’t makes sense. A hollow set of words without any substance/physicality to it.  ‘Ahimsa’ can only be real, when manifesting doing No Harm into being for All. Equal Money for All is such an Real act of doing no Harm. Become and live the words that have been scripted: “Do unto other what you would have them do unto you.” Simplicity – Be harm less.

It is easy and tempting to ‘fall’ for definitions such a promises and hope wrapped up in nice words within religion, new age and spirituality. We are All so lost that most of us look for solace in religion/spirituality or anything that can guide you to make sense out of our world/reality we’re living in.

We should ask ourselves whether our actions in the quest of “silencing the mind” are beneficial for All or only benefit ourselves, only bettering ourselves. We must include the physical reality of our world, and what the words we are living as definitions brings about practically, substantially as the manifested reality we are living in.

Being Silent is a physical action, walked into Being through real labor the tools that are pillars of support within walking being harmless are: -Self Forgiveness, Self Honesty, Self Corrective application, writing yourself to freedom and studying the principle of Oneness and Equality which is studying our world/this reality and thus how you as All came about.

Join us!

Learn more about these tools:

http://www.desteniiprocess.com/

Learn more about our world/our reality

http://desteni.co.za/

2011 Intimacy – I n t I m a c y – In- to–me–I-See

In- to- me- I- fear is more of a accurate description how I lived this definition of intimacy. Being intimate was always connected to someone else, something or someone out there, holding a promise of events to come, action to be taken. Hope of something always including someone else, always overlooking me, I as Here.

In-to-me-I-see

In- to- me- I- fear

Intimacy

How am I holding /living/expressing this word as me? So what I have found within me that I never actually allowed myself to live in-to-me-I-see as an actualised expression of me here. I didn’t yet allowed myself to act upon what I was seeing within me, acting upon the actual living real reality of me.

To see and understand myself without judgment or suppression of what I see, to look unconditionally at the rawness of real experience within, that what’s suppressed, the ‘I’ that is lived into being, that part that ‘I’ deem as bad, scary, deny that what is categorised as ‘Restricted’ area, that what is kept hidden and what is experienced as not preferable to surface.

I see that suppression is an automated response off walking in my reality/world – currently walking this into awareness and understanding so I can let go of the old.

What opened up and which I start to understand is the unresolved part of ‘me’ within relationships. I’m walking the unresolved parts of me within the rawness and realness of the suppressed REAL experience within.  I’ll start with me in relation to relationship.(This is also currently what we are walking in the ‘I’ Process within the SRA course section Mind Construct) I allow myself to spend time with me so to speak, getting to know me, myself and how I exist within the suppressed parts of me which I’ve categorized as ‘bad’.

I overlooked the initial step -of Self -Intimacy in relation to relationships completely.

Its about getting to know self first, getting familiar with ‘me’ first, what did I actually accept and allow as me within me and how does this play out, how do I act this out? Instead of running off again, instead of running to someone to live the word Intimacy as In-To-ME- I- FEAR when not directed recreating the past over and over again. Eventually Expressing itself through asking another: “Be intimate with me!” Demanding from another what I’m  not able to give to myself because I’ve never allowed myself  to Live Self Intimacy as an actualised expression of self, as a living physical giving action.

To build a real REALationship with Self first is what it takes! To get to a clear understanding of myself without holding any point back. To walk through every fear or resistance that I’m holding onto in order to prevent myself to dig deeper into me, getting to know me  the core of me, stand naked, all self judgements and all cards on the table, to enable self to go to the darkness within.

Taken from my Daily writings 02/02/11

Learn more on Mind Construct: http://www.desteniiprocess.com/

2011 Mercy and Compassion is an act of Giving – Give your Vote to World Equality!

I always believed that somehow I could bypass being responsible for world events such as war, poverty, abuse, famine etc. by simple giving my attention to something else. During my educational years – studying fine arts and exploring the picture presentation of this world -I didn’t got to a clear comprehensive assertive understanding of this world/reality. Despise all the years I’ve spend within the educational system it didn’t allow me to develop and explore understanding of being in this world and through this express responsibility for all as a natural expression that’s intrinsic with being in this world/reality.

It has made me a ‘useful’ member yes, but not amember that takes responsibility for all Equally, – it’s also not what our educational system is aiming for. Educating is being used for god the system to continue and to secure its existence.

Fleeing and escaping into visual ‘beauty’ and ‘esthetics’ deliberately avoiding any political involvement or engagement made me actually  belief  that I was safe yet escaping what is Real doesn’t make the ‘boogie man’ go away. That only exist within fairy tales.

It really doesn’t make sense to perceive that what isn’t ‘in your face’ isn’t part of your responsibility, by not acknowledging our ability to response to our world we don’t even bother to ask ourselves if we hold the power within to establish change for the betterment of all. Running away from the Real Raw Physical reality has never been the solution and it will never be the solution. That’s a law within this reality, you cant jus shovel the Manifested Physical Reality underneath the carpet without unnecessary manifested consequences.

We need to be able to question ourselves from where; what; how; when and from whom we’re actually walking/running away from. This challenge will lead to ourselves again. Answering these questions and living them into alignment with what is best for all will be the foundation for the Principle of Education on how we will teach our children and the children yet to come. For them to be able to live and understand this reality so no harm will ever be done upon Life again.

If you would ask any parent in this world, and I am a parent myself – if its preferable to teach your child to walk away from the world ‘outside’ – because is too ‘hard to bare’, not ‘nice, not how you ‘prefer’ it to be, not what you ‘like’ it to be. Every parent would say NO this is NOT what you want to teach/show your child yet we’re all Demonstrating exactly this construct. Running away from the manifested consequences ‘Out there’! We walk away from what we perceive as ‘Out There’ while in essence what we see as ‘impossible’ to deal with is exactly what we live as ourselves, running away from ourselves until infinity, not facing what we have manifested within our World/ Reality.

How much more suffering do we need to create into manifestation before we had enough? Do we really need to go as far until every single child is killed, raped, molested, mind controlled, when all colored people, women, the disabled, the poor and the list goes on and on until eventually every minority= threat in name of the system to survive will be destroyed. There is no Mercy within the current system. We the people must bring back Compassion to and as the people to give what we want for ourselves.

There is a legal body=Democracy already in place that calls for each single one of us to utilize our individual single votes so we can walk the Power of the Majority into being, to bring about change Equally for ALL. We are the People, the world ‘Out There! We, you and me are the ones that are within the position to bring change! Use your Vote as an act of Giving!

Politics is Here – Democracy is Here You are Here – I am Here!

So what are you waiting for?

I’m one vote for world Equality! Join us! Equal Life foundation – Equal money for All – http://equalmoney.org/

In changing the money system – we change All else

2011 The Power of the majority – from Demons are cracy to Equality for All

During an interview with Nawaal el-Saadawi she was asked the following.

Q:Is the fight for democracy and women’s rights one and the same?

A:Yes they are the same.

Q:Why?

A:There is no Democracy without women because women are half the society or more then half the society so how can you have democracy without half the society”

Simplicity! It’s irrational to state that the power of the majority is exercised when half of the people aren’t included.

Real Democracy can’t exist when more then half of the world’s population isn’t included because we let them starve to death. Simple unacceptable!

Equality can not exist without those that we deliberately exclude, those that are starving to death; at the moment more then half of the World’s population. How can Equality exist when we exclude more then half of the World’s people?

 

You cant its irrational!

So for those that say: “Why should we have World Equality or vote for World Equality in the first place?”– well cut of your pink or your hand or your head and while you at it your legs as well and then ask again.The physical human body is One, Humanity as a whole is One, and the practical application of Oneness is Equality, its really simple!

Give your vote for World Equality

Join us! Equal Life Foundation

Equal money for All http://equalmoney.org/

‘Inspired’ by Nawaal el-Saadawi Human Rights Activist and feminist.

“Writing: such has been my crime ever since I was a small child. To this day writing remains my crime. Now, although I am out of prison, I continue to live inside a prison of another sort, one without steel bars. For the technology of oppression and might without justice has become more advanced, and the fetters imposed on mind and body have become invisible. The most dangerous shackles are the invisible ones, because they deceive people into believing they are free. This delusion is the new prison that people inhabit today, north and south, east and west…We inhabit the age of the technology of false consciousness, the technology of hiding truths behind amiable humanistic slogans that may change from one era to another…Democracy is not just freedom to criticize the government or head of state, or to hold parliamentary elections. True democracy obtains only when the people – women, men, young people, children – have the ability to change the system of industrial capitalism that has oppressed them since the earliest days of slavery: a system based on class division, patriarchy, and military might, a hierarchical system that subjugates people merely because they are born poor, or female, or dark-skinned.”
— Nawal El Saadawi (Memoirs from the Women’s Prison)

2011 Documenting the World’s atrocities in pictures is useless when we don’t act upon it.

Probably we all seen this picture of the Afghan woman that has been molested, her nose and ears have been cut off because she had left her abusive husband. This picture was on one of last year covers of Times Magazine and has shocked the world.This picture is the World Press Photo of the year 2010.

We document the world horrors capture it in pictures reward the oness that do so with prestigious prizes, we compete documents of pictures. Through pictures we show information yet when not acted upon it, it becomes useless knowledge – we can’t say: “ We didn’t know of such cruel and inhumane atrocities going on.” We know! Its documented each single day for each one to see.

We stand aside; sitting on a fence, commenting on such events and eventually become numb. We say to ourselves what can we do? And by this we will ‘sit out our lives’ on a fence discussing into infinity: “What could have been and What would have been” in a perfect world -oh sure, yet it will not change a thing.

How did we end up within indifference and inactive towards cruelties done upon our fellow men?

Let the pictures Will the way to Physically Press ourselves into Physical action that Will Manifest real Change that encompasses All, the pictures as the compass that Will us All to change for the betterment of All.

To end all abuse and inhumanity for Ones and for ALL

Join us:

Equal money for all is the solution for all –http://equalmoney.org

Give your Vote for world Equality so we can for Ones and for All stop All abuse in this world

The picture is taken by South African photographer Bieber

2011 The Era of Eros-Desire as Addiction

I Perceive and experience Sweetness as the point of self nurturing through a construct within the structure. I ‘lose’ myself within this specific experience as perceived sweetness.

This point is automated as me I did not yet walked this point into clarity it has multiple dimensions/layers to it.

When shopping yesterday I observed how I was automatically drifting off through projecting automated wants/needs/desires for a relationship. This is part of desiring a relationship being automated and addicted to participate within these projections, pertaining wants, needs, fantasies, projections and what not.

How is it being ignited? Among things Through walking in my world/reality automatically locking into pictures, graphics, symbols and from there automatically spiral into a mind construct of desire or more accurately a possession of mind.

So I actually start becoming aware of how I now utilise pictures, graphics, symbols to ignite wants and needs and so on to generate energy – something to participate within. It could actually have been anything. Yet at this stage most prominently is desire.

I ‘enjoy’ experiencing myself as such, I am addicted to this perceived experience of myself. I have given it high value and importance to experience myself within this perceived experience of self. I’m addicted to it a junk, actually nothing beats this experience- not sex; masturbation nor drugs. It’s within this allowance and drifting off to projections of me ‘there’, because it pertains hope and a future that will never be lived.

The whole construct and me participation within it is irrational and I use reason, logic to justify my participation and thus not acceptable. I can’t accept not to trust myself within this point. I didn’t yet opened this point up and I will through writing and walking it, to get to the nitty- gritty of it, all cards on the table.

Getting to know me, before I am off to ‘someone’ out ‘there’ again to distract myself from what is real.

I don’t give a fuck about another person within the above construct because I want what I want and the person is only placed within this position to keep the construct in place. Even when one is in a relationship one is exercising within it- someone out ‘there’ to dream about, to linger for to drift off to projections and shit like that.

So its not even to be off to someone again – the other doesn’t even exist that person only exist within my head. Actually only within a closed boxed where I then locked into, all of me contained within a box of projections,fantasies, ideas and so on.

The thing is I didn’t yet consider nor saw all implications of my individual participation and how this is the fore stage/fore play of ending up married with children, and isn’t this exactly what we are all from a very early age desire? To end up with someone either looking for an ultimate sexual experience or what ever we make up within our irrational reasoning to chase who ever we want what ever we want whenever we want no matter the consequences of our actions.

Dangerous shit when you don’t know where you are dealing with and not know who you are within it what you do, and really completely unnecessary!

This is how we bring children into being.

This starting point is fucked up and we must change and de-engineer ourselves, no parent wants to bring this about yet we’re all living it into being by simple participating within the ‘smallest’ point of desiring to be with someone.

Desire should be on the list of mental disorders – those who ‘suffer’ from such mental disorder cant be trusted with Life.

I can tell cause I have been such person myself the thing is that whether the world is burning or not you actually don’t give a fuck because you are trapped within the Era of Eros and grateful for what actually? That you found what actually? That you are married with children and now what? That you have sex on a regular basis, that you have a steady relationship?  I mean WTF, how many people ‘cheat’ on their partner? how many people leave their partner to get something ‘better’ in return. I mean that in itself should already show how fucked up this chase for such perceived experience is. To desire such a thing because in actuality  it doesn’t exist it only exist within ones head and the rawness of the physical reality will never meet that whats inside your head and you will freaking fucking never be satisfied because within the Eara of Eros such a point doesn’t exist within the physical reality.Thats the factuality of it.

Time to get Real:

Show the way to be the way and live the way into being for the children and the children yet to come

http://www.desteniiprocess.com/

2011 Response to Cathy’s blog post: Who Have You Been Or Become In The Name Of Money? Married!

I found within me that I got married because of securing the money point and I wasn’t even aware of it, it took me a while to understand what and how I placed/positioned this point and how securing the money point within my world came about.

It showed me that the ‘way’ that leads to marriage/relationship is wrapped up nicely as experiences and energetic addictions such as desire, love, sex, lust, partnership, companionship, dreams, ideas, perceptions, assumptions, fantasies, projections and what not all meticulously placed to make-up/ to secure the money point.

Through relationships/marriage we eventually fuck ourselves a way into the family construct to produce children as clones for the preservation of the world system and through this we keep the heart=money of the system alive and kicking.

By not seeing nor being aware of its design and why its designed and placed as such makes us easy sheep for the system to survive because we are controlled by our desires and needs to be with that other one instead of being One.

The need/want/desire for sex or wanting to find the right guy/girl Is such a ‘normal’ accepted expression of our ‘nature’ that we don’t even question this very nature yet its something we need to question to find the answers to ourselves! We never allowed ourselves to actually question to investigate the real experience of desire as addiction, because no one wants to give up his or her ‘lolly pop’.

Desire and need for the one to spend your life with will lead you being caught and trapped and enslaved in the total design of this reality!

You must actually think twice before you jurk off or loose yourself in daydreaming about the one, or both activities at the same time – all right?

What a total waste of time!

So time to stop this recycling of the past and get to know one self!

You simple Join us at the Desteni ‘I’ Process. Where we take the ‘I’ on and investigate and study who ‘I’ is in relation to relationships.

“It is the process of the ‘I’ in this world. As Humans we exist as the ‘I’ – the “who am ‘I’”, the “how am ‘I’”, the “why am ‘I’”, the “what am ‘I’”, the “where am ‘I’” – All the questions about the ‘I’ “

So the ‘I’ can meet the ‘I’, eye to eye – and see for oneself what remains of ‘I’, ok! that’s it.

http://www.desteniiprocess.com/

Link to Cathy’s Blog, check it out!!

Who Have You Been Or Become In The Name Of Money?

2011 ‘One’s Type’

He isn’t my type 

Interestingly enough I always ‘ended up’ in a relationship with someone that wasn’t really my type.

The above:

Implies desire

Implies that the person I’m in a relationship with isn’t ‘good’ enough for me, that there is someone ‘better’ out there.

Implies that there is someone out there who is my type with characteristics that I find suitable for me, that fulfil the projections of a ‘my type’ person.

So to live the belief that I ended up with someone that wasn’t really my type keeps the desire alive. It’s the feeding ground for a back door, its indicative for where one is standing: – within hope, and desire for someone out there, a yearning that contains a promise that one day this expectancy will be fulfilled.

Quite a fuck up.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to believe that my type exist

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to live the belief that I always end up with someone that isn’t really my type

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to live and hold the construct that there is someone better out there for me to find then the one I am currently in a relationship with.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to leave a backdoor open so I am able to project my desires of finding ‘my type’ while being in a relationship.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to live the construct: that the one I’m in a relationship with is not my type and thus leave a backdoor open to project my desires outside of myself of eventually finding ‘my type’.

Living and existing within a polarity-construct of my type/not my type isn’t serving me, living through such construct and measuring/comparing my current relationship to this polarity construct is irrational and therefore I let it go.

I understand and see that there doesn’t exist such a person as I have constructed it as in my type of a person and the opposite thereof.

Irrational within this is that I actually never met a ‘my type’ of person and yet I am striving to find such person. So how I base my assumptions, perceptions and ideas of the right kind/my kind of person on a illusion is completely irrational and it doesn’t makes any sense.

It’s the embodiment of stupidity – lol

2011 Head suckers

Head suckers

The girls are again infected with head louse, a reality that creates little children dependent on grown ups to get the blood suckers off is kind of disturbing.

So Lou became while getting the head louse off kind of hysterical I start to see what’s going on. She’s then actually totally ‘gone’ so she starts off with crying as a way to manipulate, then she starts to get into the energy of crying b/c of crying. So Zina started to laugh b/c she sees clearly what’s going on and so do I.

When I was holding her she said; -“I cant stop crying mom”, I see that ‘her ways’ always assist her to get it ‘her way’ when she’s not with us yet I have to remind her when she’s with us to remain Here and that she has to stop manipulating – so she knows and sees the difference yet sometimes it seems that she’s really getting confused about ‘there’ and Here.

What a fuck up we have created for our children and also completely unnecessary, time to change to recreate this world, – its only one letter; one breathe,- from there to Here for all to Walk in Equality.